i am so happy

i am so happy i jump out of this window
say fuck you to toher people's emotions
and spend time in my womb/room to cry
it is joy

i am so happy
the day is shining and the blood that drips from my nostrils jumps with life

i am so happy
my feet are bent
the hairs on my legs are so scartchy and i feel inhuman

i am so happy
i don't understand you
i don't understand you
i don't i won't i can't understand you

i am so happy
i cannot talk
i cannot chase

it does not serve me
it does not serve me

closeness
by not wanting it


no



i am so happy

i feel fingernails crawl under my toe nails
i am so happy
i disown my own lust


i am so happy
fuck you
i am so happy i do not care what happens to you
i care for you so much
i lust after you
i wash my body in rags of pain after you
let me wash myself in front of you
let me bathe my toes in front of you
oily with dirty oil from the last change
filter less



scrape the filter


grape less


scrape less



fake less



pose 

scrape


maker shift

fuck


bags


ache


scratchy things called hair

i love you.

audio: i am so happy